Celebrity Constellation - 14 Night Exotic Southern Caribbean Cruise

Celebrity Constellation - 14 Night Exotic Southern Caribbean Cruise

The 4th December was a sea day - yay! I was glad to catch up with sleep but unfortunately, despite having the heating on full, it was so bloody cold I woke up with the start of a sinus headache. According to the itinerary maps, we, Infinity and Millennium were all going between Cuba and Haiti so after I got dressed, I went to see if I could see one of them. Before heading up though, I mentioned the cold to Blasido and he said he would get someone to up the heat, because it was warmer in the bathroom. Then as I was going up, I saw Mustafa dash past the top of the stairs carrying the new Excite the Senses books, which Celebrity insist are NOT cookbooks. Next thing I knew, I was signing a receipt for $49.95! How the bloody hell did he do that? He said he would get it signed by the chef and someone else and have it delivered to my cabin. Now I had to work out how I was going to get something which weighed a tonne home, regardless of the free Celebrity bag (have several already!). Lunch was on him though, and he sent me to the Bistro on 5 where he was paying. Delicious crepes but very filling. I had the hot and spicy minus bell peppers and also the chocolate for dessert. It's somewhere you pay but it really is worth it for the price.

According to Captain Peppas' noon announcement, it was a force 7 out there. It had already rained a bit. I needed to go and try and spot a ship but first, a quick detour to the Grand Foyer to pick up Britain Today, where they had begun to put up the Christmas decorations. First stop was the Prom deck then up to 11 where I did my Marilyn Monroe impression. Well the men power walking on the jogging track enjoyed my skirt blowing up! No sign of another cruise ship anywhere!

Afterwards, I took my laptop to Online@Celebrity and tried to work out how to sign up to the internet. Even though they use MTN Sat like the other ships, they have a different system and packages. To sign up, you have to use one of the desktops and swipe your card, putting in a username and password rather than go on any with your name and cabin number. Once you're all logged on, you can then use the system in the hotspots on your wireless device. Because of being a two week cruise, I took out the 555 minute package, which was $199.95. The usual 250 minute package on other ships is $100 (except Cunard where it's cheaper)so what Celebrity offered was good value. Being a Select member of the Captain's Club now, I had 25% off so I actually found a coupon which was useful! When I returned to the cabin, I found the door outside open and the engineer working on something. He said he had increased the heat so I had a siesta for a few hours. When I got up at 5.30pm, it was freezing! I washed my hair and saw a ship on the webcam but it was too far away for any photos. I mentioned the cold again to Blasido as I was going to see, who came in the cabin after he had sorted out a tie for the son of an American family opposite. The boy and girl had their formal outfits but the parents had left their other suitcase at home, which contained them. Well Blasido could feel the cold so called the engineer again. After a Coke in the Rendezvous to pass time I returned to the cabin and it was warm! Blasido is a star. Had a shower then dropped the disembarkation questionnaire off at Guest Relations before heading to dinner. We had another person in the form of Carmel from London. It was her first cruise, paid for by her daughter. Afterwards, it was the Captain's Welcome toast where he announced Connie scored 100% in her inspection (clearly helped by the cleaning following a norovirus outbreak during the repositioning), followed by the show, iHollywood, about Hollywood through the decades. I particularly enjoyed the silent movie, Dirty Dancing and James Bond segments. I've included a lot of photos here to show the variety of the show. Then I saw more decorations had gone up in the Grand Foyer so I got those before going back to the cabin and to bed in a warmer room.

The next day was another at sea so I got up around 11am. I still had a slight sinus headache but the room was more tolerable. I wish these aircon controls had an off switch. May have been warmer! It's funny that the only time I've actually had hot was on Queen Mary 2 and it is a nuisance my teeth are so sensitive I need it that way, even though they're not affected by cold food and drink, only cool air. It was another force 7 and I went onto the Prom deck after some shopping. There were some dolphins but the buggers hid when cameras came out. I went for lunch in the San Marco, which now had Christmas decorations but I didn't take any photos at this time. At 1.30pm was pool volleyball between the marine and hotel crew with Captain Peppas observing. Hotel won and would face a team comprised of passengers later in the cruise.

The toilet broke down, but the vacuum hadn't been strong when I boarded so it was only a matter of time. Within five minutes of me reporting at to Guest Relations, the plumber was at work and it was all fixed, vacuum more powerful, ten minutes after that. Time for another kip. Cruising is exhausting! It was the Senior Officers booze up in Reflections for Select and Elite Captain's Club members and pretty boring. It was only lively after American Shelley and her mum Kathy sat at my table. They were such a good laugh and that's where we first came across Leather Woman and her comb-over husband because the old lady was wearing a white halter-neck mini dress, flashing her boobs at the world! Bloody hell! Bloodhound face was scary while he needed his glasses changing since he looked lustfully at her on the dance floor! Either that or he was drunk or had a lobotomy. Eurgh! To dinner and only me and Carmel turned up then back to the cabin and sleep.

Morning was an early start for our Aruba arrival, only we were already in when I went on deck at 6.30am (had been due for 7am) and Caribbean Princess was coming my way! She would be in the berth in front and would be leaving two hours before us. It was interesting seeing her since in May 2012, she will make her Southampton debut, replacing Crown Princess (though I think 2013 we lose Grand and Crown returns) so I could give her a close-up going over.

Had a dreadful breakfast in the Seaside then back to bed. Because my Best of Aruba tour was meeting at 1pm, you have to rush any lunch to be out for the meeting time. All my tours had afternoon options, which was better than rush, rush, rush in the morning and fighting people for breakfast. This was where I first encountered John and his wife, who were from Fort Lauderdale, and we had a nice chat over lunch from our respective tables. I found out later they were in the same corridor as me.

Kathy and Shelley were also on the tour and sat in front reserved disability seats. An American called Lisa sat next to me and as soon as she found out I was English, asked, "What Doctor Who are we up to?" Unusual way to start a conversation! Good job I was a fan so we also discussed the original series, which she also watched as a child. Our guide was called Luis and greeted in the terminal with, "Welcome to Jamaica!" I know I've always been crap at geography, but never that crap. Luis was very funny as we went around. The first stop was the Fantastic Gardens, a garden centre where we were shown five native plants and it rained! Then we got an aloe vera demonstration, which reminded me of my tour in Lanzarote on QM2, and free time to shop so I went back to the bus. Afterwards was the California Lighthouse, named after the US ship, California, which sank in 1891. The lighthouse was built between 1914-16. We passed a church with missing tiles from a hurricane and were told in cemeteries, bones are dug up after being buried five years, put in a small box and reburied, which makes room for more family members in the same plot. Great idea but can imagine the uproar if anyone dared suggest doing it here. They're dead so don't care! Next stop was the Casibari Rock Formation. I would have loved to have climbed to the viewing point at the top but even if I wasn't afraid of heights, I wouldn't have risked breaking my neck with my back. Then we went to the Natural Bridge, or the remains of it since it collapsed in 2005. There was still a smaller one around. On the way back we stopped at a couple of coastal places for shots and some of the dark lava patches reminded me of Lanzarote.

It hadn't been a bad tour thanks to Luis, but it didn't match the blurb in the shore excursions brochure which said, "See Aruba's most popular attractions like the Palm Beach, the California Lighthouse, the Alto Vista Chapel, the Gold Mills Ruins, the Natural Bridge Ruins." Well two of those isn't bad! Probably passed the others. I was peckish so went to the Seaside before the sailing of Caribbean Princess and discovered their fabulous curries! This is one thing P&O do well (except for bone in the chicken) so I hadn't expected something really spicy on a Celebrity ship. Phew! Just as I like it! I chose the beef this time and it was wonderful mean, no fat whatsoever. I'd definitely be going there again. So up for the sailaway and she gave three blasts as she moved.

Our sailaway was 8pm and I was trying to get a photo of the tree by the port entrance when I noticed we were off - early! Captain Peppas came on about 8.15pm and you couldn't hear a flipping word he said. "Mumble, mumble, Curaçao, mumble, shopping, mumble." Speak up, man! It was quite windy once we left the shelter of the port.

Dinner! Bill, Cheryl and Barbara had gone to Bistro on 5 the night before, hence their absences. Mustafa came along to tell people around the restaurant not to bother having dessert, but go to the Bistro and have it there instead. I get the feeling Bill didn't want Carmel around so said he was all creped out. Those two didn't really get along and Bill didn't really talk like the rest of us did. I'd ordered a salad which said watercress, expecting it to be like we get in the UK. I hadn't expected something the equivalent to eating nettles. Ugh! Once Bill disappeared at 10.30pm, we all carried on yakking and were the last to leave at 11.05pm! I then went back to the cabin and bed.

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